I have been skinny most of my entire life, being Chinese and having Chinese parents we always had a strict and controlled diet. I was always told I was so petite and small and they would fear they would break me when they would grab me.. Not once during my teenage years did I think I would be fat let alone morbidly obese. This is my story.
I was very shy and timid throughout high school and only had a couple of friends, however one of them was a friend I’ve known since forever, we’ve ALWAYS been close. We always stuck together in school and we had several sleepovers and my parents always criticized her weight. I honestly couldn’t care less how much she weighed, I wouldn’t think anything of it because she’s such an amazing friend.
We both wanted to go to college together and move away and rent a place. During our senior year we were checking out colleges and universities and majors. We both fell in love with the idea of nursing. After we graduated our dream came true. We moved to San Diego to study at a university we got accepted into!
It has been amazing for the most part, we loved it and it was so much fun helping each other out with our assignments and projects and giving each other motivation but what we both disregarded was our health with our food choices. We did not almost at all eat any homemade food. I thought in my mind I couldn’t possibly get fat because my metabolism was “fast” WRONG. After a few months went by I gained an insane amount of weight. I went from skinny petite to chubby. I was extremely depressed and I was determined to lose it all but it was difficult to make time and effort to exercise or actually cook. So I put it to the side and put it on my to do it list for the future. Time passed and I gained more and more weight. I avoided video chatting with my parents and when I did my face would be really close to the camera so they couldn’t see a difference. It wasn’t until someone posted a photo I was in during a party and my parents saw it. My mom called me crying and angry asking what has happened to me. It destroyed me completely and left me feeling like complete trash. I had a addiction to fast food without even realizing it. Now I’m over 300 pounds and I recently moved in to my parents house due to Covid and I’m fat shamed EVERY SINGLE DAY due to being literally the only fat person in my family. I feel like I failed as a person and I feel disgusted looking at myself. My family can be very rude and careless and I’m called by many rude nicknames and my extended family make me feel worse. Yesterday my aunt came over and when I opened the door she literally said: “Oh my god!! What happened to you why are you so fat?!” How in the world am I suppose to answer that?
I have no idea what steps to take and where I should even start. I’m crying writing this because I have no one to vent to and this is the only place that came to mind.
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